The Antidote To Bitterness

With the frenzy in which we live every day, the days seem like a mere chain of tasks to complete. It is easy to become frustrated and bitter.

Why does this have to happen to me? Why don’t others have these problems? Why doesn’t life give me a break?

It is easy for these situations to overwhelm us. It’s normal, each of us fights a battle invisible to the world. And it is our responsibility to win this battle and help others in theirs.

The most powerful antidote I know to combat these thoughts and sensations is gratitude.

You can’t be resentful and grateful at the same time. One cancels out the other.

These are some of the ways I practice it. Of course, adapt, test and find out what works for you.

Small doses of gratitude

Throughout the day, stop for a few seconds to appreciate precious moments:

• When you go to eat, be grateful that you have enough wealth to not go hungry and try not to waste any food. Normally, I put my hands together and close my eyes for a few seconds to give thanks for this meal.
• When you are enjoying and laughing with your loved ones, think about how unlikely it is that all the previous events occurred for you to be together. Remember how much you love them (and say it).
• Before going to sleep, review the day in your head or in a journal. Think about all the joyful moments you have had and how lucky you are to have spent another day in this world.

Don’t take your blessings for granted

When we become accustomed to certain goods or luxuries, we take them for granted. We forget what it was like to live without them, and in some cases, we have never experienced it.

My grandparents lived during the famines of Mao’s communist China. I still remember all the stories they told me when I was little about what their daily lives were like.

In comparison, our lifestyle is much more luxurious than the most extravagant medieval kings. We have all kinds of amenities incredibly quickly. Let’s not take them for granted.

The 13th century Persian poet Sa’adi Shizari described it masterfully:

I cried because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.

Thank your past self

Don’t forget to thank the person who got you to where you are today. You.

If you enjoy a fit body, a calm mind and a house full of love, it is thanks to all the effort, discipline and dedication of your past self.

The position you have, the achievements and status you enjoy is all thanks to your past self.

Don’t forget to recognize your own merits, and use them to inspire you on the way to future successes.

An interesting exercise is to write a thank you letter to your past self.

Appreciate nature

If you have the opportunity to walk in a park, on the beach or in the mountains, appreciate the grandeur of the beauty of the environment: the trees, the undergrowth, the rivers, the sea, the sky, the birds, the fresh air…

Sometimes we forget how incredibly beautiful and vast the universe is. Almost instantly, it reminds us that we are a small thread in a fabric so large that we are incapable of conceiving it and that everything is connected.

Our problems almost disappear when we feel this immensity.

Practicing gratitude is like training a muscle: it requires perseverance, discipline and dedication. But the results are transformative.

It helps us see the extraordinary in the ordinary, to value what we have and to recognize our own and other people’s efforts that have brought us here.

By cultivating a mindset of gratitude, we will find more peace in the present, greater connection with others, and strength to face the challenges of the future.